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The ****ing Offseason Thread 2018

Deckie007 said:
They only have like 3.5M coming off the books. That will be eaten up by raises to their RFAs. I think you're high if you think they'll be able to make a competitive offer for Tavares, dumping Hossa and Arty's contracts notwithstanding. If you sign Tavares for 10M, how are you giving Schmaltz or potentially Sikura a longterm deal when their ELCs are up next year?
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He's been saying this for weeks. It was Carlson that he first brought this up about.

Carlson was unlikely as hell but whatever. Tavares is fever dreams type stuff.
 
If we aren't going Tavares i'd like to see us go big money on Kovalchuk for 1 year. Whatever the max would be to get him here. It would be a prove it deal for the rest of the league while being really lucrative for him. If it doesn't work out he's gone after the season.

He'd be that big bomb shot from the point we're currently missing.
 
Leafin' said:
If we aren't going Tavares i'd like to see us go big money on Kovalchuk for 1 year. Whatever the max would be to get him here. It would be a prove it deal for the rest of the league while being really lucrative for him. If it doesn't work out he's gone after the season.

He'd be that big bomb shot from the point we're currently missing.
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Yeah, I've been 100% behind this idea for a while now.

By no means should we give him term, but on a large one-year deal, he'd be a hell of a JVR replacement.
 
Volcanologist said:
kovalchuk will get term though. from somebody.
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I don't know man. Wrong side of 35 and carries a massive "take his ball and go home" risk. If he retires from the NHL again, his contract doesn't come off the cap.

So if by "term" we mean 2 years...maybe. But Radulov was younger, carrying similar stigma and only got 1 yr. I know part of that was him betting on himself, and he could have took term at lower money apparently, but still.
 
Time to play guess the idiot

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Sent from my SM-G950W using Tapatalk
 
All these guys are going to do is ensure the continuation of Lou's media blackout policies. It's such a good approach because you always know their claims are made up bullshit.

'NHL source' = hot dog vendor outside the ACC. 'No, Phil really does like my dog food.'
 
I made the biggest call in forumice history, Leaf, history, Maybe a few will allow me that non crow pie bow. I said within weeks of seeing Luke Schenn that he was extremely limited.

Great call, perhaps a generational, call, but alas, it lead me to leave the board, no, I was booted under the name teeder.

Now, I am making another generational call. I think Matthews is a massive dud. An imposter. Who has a huge shot, but his shot is already physically accounted for. He is a weak mans, pig nose Wendy Clark, just an awful guy to build a team around I expect a huge amount of flak, just like what got me booted for Schenn.

Again. Might leave me to huge MNIJ trolling.l Who is this guy? A Hawks fan? But here it is. I think the guy is a dud. A massive dud.

Again, the calves the shit skating, the shit player.... Schenn? Maybe I should be the Leafs top scout. I was not on this board, no way I pick this pig nose over Laine.


Laine, is way, way, way tougher than pig nose. Schenn part two... Lainer is way better than Matthews.

Before I leave, on my own, who called that Schenn was shit for almost two years before anyone here.

I maintain, Matthews sucks a big one. Trade him before he becomes Schenn to everyone. Over and out.

Mindz,,,,, two years I called out Schenn. Trust me on this one. Lou Lammy left Dubas a boner here and its soft.

Pig nose has the same calves as Schenn, I called it, lets see, Matthews sucks... So did Schenn. The whole NHl is covering his stupid shot now. Uggggh people are so Schenn stupid. Pig nose sucks.

My last call on forumice was Schenn reeks... What did he do afterwards? He reeked...

Matthews, guy totally sucks. The NHL has figured him out.

Tavares? Works way too hard to join this crew?

Doughty way too smart to join this crew? Dubas? Stellick part two... Shanahan, is Hitler.... He calls all the shots, I cannot wait to hear Cherry say it, but he is too smart to. **** you Leaf GM.

Again, parting ways.... I called the best call in Leaf history. Luke Schenn was schitt. Two years before the horniest guy called it.

My new call, before I go, I cannot listen to this shit. Is Matthews is a closet pouff and hates the gym and is figured out, and is the new SCHENN.

See ya, its too much to listen to yesterday drivel, tomorrow, Matthews comes out in a dress. Bye. Leaf Gm fouck off

Matthews come out in a dress, might convince all here, even Leafgm you are the new Schenn.

How can anyone not here see, this is Luke Schenn in a new gown? good Luck dubie?
 
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Iknowenuff said:
I made the biggest call in forumice history, Leaf, history, Maybe a few will allow me that non crow pie bow. I said within weeks of seeing Luke Schenn that he was extremely limited.

Great call, perhaps a generational, call, but alas, it lead me to leave the board, no, I was booted under the name teeder.

Now, I am making another generational call. I think Matthews is a massive dud. An imposter. Who has a huge shot, but his shot is already physically accounted for. He is a weak mans, pig nose Wendy Clark, just an awful guy to build a team around I expect a huge amount of flak, just like what got me booted for Schenn.

Again. Might leave me to huge MNIJ trolling.l Who is this guy? A Hawks fan? But here it is. I think the guy is a dud. A massive dud.

Again, the calves the shit skating, the shit player.... Schenn? Maybe I should be the Leafs top scout. I was not on this board, no way I pick this pig nose over Laine.


Laine, is way, way, way tougher than pig nose. Schenn part two... Lainer is way better than Matthews.

Before I leave, on my own, who called that Schenn was shit for almost two years before anyone here.

I maintain, Matthews sucks a big one. Trade him before he becomes Schenn to everyone. Over and out.

Mindz,,,,, two years I called out Schenn. Trust me on this one. Lou Lammy left Dubas a boner here and its soft.

Pig nose has the same calves as Schenn, I called it, lets see, Matthews sucks... So did Schenn. The whole NHl is covering his stupid shot now. Uggggh people are so Schenn stupid. Pig nose sucks.

My last call on forumice was Schenn reeks... What did he do afterwards? He reeked...

Matthews, guy totally sucks. The NHL has figured him out.

Tavares? Works way too hard to join this crew?

Doughty way too smart to join this crew? Dubas? Stellick part two... Shanahan, is Hitler.... He calls all the shots, I cannot wait to hear Cherry say it, but he is too smart to. **** you Leaf GM.

Again, parting ways.... I called the best call in Leaf history. Luke Schenn was schitt. Two years before the horniest guy called it.

My new call, before I go, I cannot listen to this shit. Is Matthews is a closet pouff and hates the gym and is figured out, and is the new SCHENN.

See ya, its too much to listen to yesterday drivel, tomorrow, Matthews comes out in a dress. Bye. Leaf Gm fouck off

Matthews come out in a dress, might convince all here, even Leafgm you are the new Schenn.

How can anyone not here see, this is Luke Schenn in a new gown? good Luck dubie?
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this is some outstanding stuff.
 
So, to recap, Matthews sucks as a hockey player because:


  • He has a pig nose

  • He's Luke Schenn

  • He has skinny calves

  • He's a homosexual

  • He's also apparently a cross-dresser

What can you do but bow in the face of such a rational, well-thought-out and homophobic argument?

And really, teeds. If you're going to come up with such a scorchingly hot contrarian hot-take with nothing to back it up, you'd think you'd be prepared for people to shit all over it.
 
If someone wants to comb through all the archives and create a separate thread of Teeds hot takes i know i for one would be amused.

I'm sure there's a plethora of nonsense in between Schenn's calves and Matthew's pig nose.
 
LeafGm said:
So, to recap, Matthews sucks as a hockey player because:


  • He has a pig nose

  • He's Luke Schenn

  • He has skinny calves

  • He's a homosexual

  • He's also apparently a cross-dresser

What can you do but bow in the face of such a rational, well-thought-out and homophobic argument?

And really, teeds. If you're going to come up with such a scorchingly hot contrarian hot-take with nothing to back it up, you'd think you'd be prepared for people to shit all over it.
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Such hot takes require absolute 100% absence from reality.
 
Iknowenuff said:
I made the biggest call in forumice history, Leaf, history, Maybe a few will allow me that non crow pie bow. I said within weeks of seeing Luke Schenn that he was extremely limited.

Great call, perhaps a generational, call, but alas, it lead me to leave the board, no, I was booted under the name teeder.

Now, I am making another generational call. I think Matthews is a massive dud. An imposter. Who has a huge shot, but his shot is already physically accounted for. He is a weak mans, pig nose Wendy Clark, just an awful guy to build a team around I expect a huge amount of flak, just like what got me booted for Schenn.

Again. Might leave me to huge MNIJ trolling.l Who is this guy? A Hawks fan? But here it is. I think the guy is a dud. A massive dud.

Again, the calves the shit skating, the shit player.... Schenn? Maybe I should be the Leafs top scout. I was not on this board, no way I pick this pig nose over Laine.


Laine, is way, way, way tougher than pig nose. Schenn part two... Lainer is way better than Matthews.

Before I leave, on my own, who called that Schenn was shit for almost two years before anyone here.

I maintain, Matthews sucks a big one. Trade him before he becomes Schenn to everyone. Over and out.

Mindz,,,,, two years I called out Schenn. Trust me on this one. Lou Lammy left Dubas a boner here and its soft.

Pig nose has the same calves as Schenn, I called it, lets see, Matthews sucks... So did Schenn. The whole NHl is covering his stupid shot now. Uggggh people are so Schenn stupid. Pig nose sucks.

My last call on forumice was Schenn reeks... What did he do afterwards? He reeked...

Matthews, guy totally sucks. The NHL has figured him out.

Tavares? Works way too hard to join this crew?

Doughty way too smart to join this crew? Dubas? Stellick part two... Shanahan, is Hitler.... He calls all the shots, I cannot wait to hear Cherry say it, but he is too smart to. **** you Leaf GM.

Again, parting ways.... I called the best call in Leaf history. Luke Schenn was schitt. Two years before the horniest guy called it.

My new call, before I go, I cannot listen to this shit. Is Matthews is a closet pouff and hates the gym and is figured out, and is the new SCHENN.

See ya, its too much to listen to yesterday drivel, tomorrow, Matthews comes out in a dress. Bye. Leaf Gm fouck off

Matthews come out in a dress, might convince all here, even Leafgm you are the new Schenn.

How can anyone not here see, this is Luke Schenn in a new gown? good Luck dubie?
Click to expand...

And this ladies and gentleman is what mental illness looks like.

Holy shit what did I just read?
 
well he does have a pig nose.

but actually the greatest call in forumice history was Johnny's Karlsson call. Adding to the legend is that it's basically the only thing he was ever right about.
 
Volcanologist said:
well he does have a pig nose.

but actually the greatest call in forumice history was Johnny's Karlsson call. Adding to the legend is that it's basically the only thing he was ever right about.
Click to expand...
Another layer to that is that his Karlsson call also came shortly after his "Mike Fisher will be named to the 2010 Canadian Olympic Team" prediction went up in flames.

Which was also one of the worst calls in FI history.
 
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