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Around the League 2017-2018 Edition

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MindzEye said:
Marriage contract is correct. You run into problems when you throw it in right before the wedding, she gets to claim she was coerced, etc. Got her a separate lawyer, signed 14 months before the wedding date. I'm as solid as you can be.
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Yeah you did everything you could do but a good lawyer can get out of it. I've seen it happen all too often. Marriage contracts in Canada are shit. If you have anything about home ownership in it forget about it. That shit is not even remotely binding. The other stuff can be binding but even then, it can all be fought. She doesn't need to know that though.

Best you can do is keep your funds separate and hope she doesn't challenge too much if the time comes. The beauty about these contracts is that it makes things a hell of a lot easier during a divorce. A good marriage contract should be simple and straight forward. You take from pile A, she takes from pile B and you go on about your seperate ways.
 
zeke said:
or maybe just trust her.
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Well yeah. A prenup doesn't mean you don't trust a person. It's just insurance, much like you get auto insurance. You don't plan on getting into an accident but if it happens you want to be covered. Same concept.
 
zeke said:
or maybe just trust her.
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You're more than welcome to enter business deals without a contract bro. I don't.

and yes, modern marriage is absolutely at least partially a business deal at it's core. She's more than welcome to half of what we build together from when we're married onward (regardless of who fills what role in the relationship), but what I brought into the relationship was all me. If the relationship doesn't end up working out, I intend on doing what I can to ensure that I leave with what I showed up with. There's nothing unfair about that.
 
Hoglund14 said:
Yeah you did everything you could do but a good lawyer can get out of it. I've seen it happen all too often. Marriage contracts in Canada are shit. If you have anything about home ownership in it forget about it. That shit is not even remotely binding.
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Yeah, I'm aware of the matrimonial home bit. You can't just write in "and I keep the house", she's entitled to half of the principle residence. In my case the only property I currently own is an investment/rental though (a couple provinces away), so that helps a lot.

The other stuff can be binding but even then, it can all be fought. She doesn't need to know that though.
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Anything can be fought over, contract or no. It's a matter of how bitter you are and how much of the pot you're willing to feed to your lawyers.

Best you can do is keep your funds separate and hope she doesn't challenge too much if the time comes. The beauty about these contracts is that it makes things a hell of a lot easier during a divorce. A good marriage contract should be simple and straight forward. You take from pile A, she takes from pile B and you go on about your seperate ways.
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Yeah, all of our finances are separate and I manage both my money and her money. Wonderful woman, but not great at math.
 
MindzEye said:
You're more than welcome to enter business deals without a contract bro. I don't.

and yes, modern marriage is absolutely at least partially a business deal at it's core. She's more than welcome to half of what we build together from when we're married onward (regardless of who fills what role in the relationship), but what I brought into the relationship was all me. If the relationship doesn't end up working out, I intend on doing what I can to ensure that I leave with what I showed up with. There's nothing unfair about that.
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And that's the kind of prenup that is most likely to hold up. Simple, fair and straight forward. As long as you don't contribute to what you had before in your investments and keep them separate then what you make when you're maried, it'll be easy to track if it doesn't work out. 'Id recommend this for everyone getting married, not just those with a heavily imbalanced financial situation.
 
MindzEye said:
Yeah, I'm aware of the matrimonial home bit. You can't just write in "and I keep the house", she's entitled to half of the principle residence. In my case the only property I currently own is an investment/rental though (a couple provinces away), so that helps a lot.



Anything can be fought over, contract or no. It's a matter of how bitter you are and how much of the pot you're willing to feed to your lawyers.



Yeah, all of our finances are separate and I manage both my money and her money. Wonderful woman, but not great at math.
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I remember the one and only Donald Trump saying something good about this subject many years ago, before complete senility set in.

He said that the only people who shouldn't have a prenup are people who don't expect to ever make anything in their lifetimes. If you're going to just be living paycheck to paycheck, why bother? But if you're planning on piling together some cash and assets over your career, then it's not even up for debate that you need something.

In my own personal life, I was engaged until around a year and a half ago, but very soon after the engagement, I started seeing a lot of things that concerned me. One of the issues was related to money and so I started to float the concept, just to see how she'd react. Other, more pressing issues preempted the prenup subject, but based on what I saw from her, I wouldn't be surprised at all if it would have blown up over that. I broke it off over those other issues that I decided were going to make me miserable, like her family and certain difficult qualities she had. And the day after I broke it off, I felt a massive sense of relief wash over me, that I'd dodged the ultimate bullet.

On some level, I still don't like the concept of a prenup. I feel it mars something that really shouldn't be about money. But then again, see how awful these situations turn out when there's nothing set in advance, I don't know how I could enter a marriage without one. It's a tough thing.
 
Artnes said:
I cleaned up a bed full of shit at 3am this morning

Welcome to future fatherhood!

(Congrats on the engagement too)
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Thanks bro. Wifey and I will have to make the run to Edmonton this summer. Timmay and his wifey are heading out this way on a roadie in July, so that might be a decent opportunity.
 
Volcanologist said:
jesus titty****ing christ
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I get what he's saying and all, but if you're of even moderate net worth you're basically asking for someone to weigh the pros and cons of staying with you a handful of years into the marriage but on the pro side she can now consider what life would be like without you (and all relationships hit rough patches, even good ones) with half of your shit plus spousal support. A good pre nup tips the balance enough that it prioritizes staying in the relationship for that level of financial security. It can definitely be enough to help get through the rough patches.
 
LeafOfFaith said:
On some level, I still don't like the concept of a prenup. I feel it mars something that really shouldn't be about money. But then again, see how awful these situations turn out when there's nothing set in advance, I don't know how I could enter a marriage without one. It's a tough thing.
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Nobody likes the concept of a pre nup. I'm getting married because I want to spend my life with this woman, but sometimes life ****s up relationships that started out strong as ****. We used to hear about "handshake" business deals and such too, but that has rightfully died off as a manner of conducting business. This is no different if there's any sort of financial imbalance in the relationship. I could easily maintain a relationship without their being legal status attached to it, so if I'm being asked to do something I don't need to do, then I just need to know that I'm protected to a certain degree if things go sideways. It's one of the few items in society where people are shit on for protecting themselves legally, it's weird.
 
It's totally weird. But it stems from the love conquers all philosophy, which unfortunately has been badly debunked in the last several decades, yet still lingers on on some emotional level.
 
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